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Emotional Affairs: What They Are and How to Heal

A spouse can be unfaithful on different levels. She could be sleeping with another person. He could be supporting another person monetarily without his spouse’s knowledge. Or he could be having an emotional affair.  Emotional Affairs: What They Are and How to Heal?

What is an Emotional Affair?

One of the great benefits of being married is being able to talk to that person, be honest, share sorrow and happiness, and lean on each other when the going gets tough. However, if a spouse begins to cultivate an emotional relationship with someone else, then she is getting her emotional support from that person and not her spouse. This is a betrayal, and it leads to loneliness, lack of trust, and resentment. An emotional affair can ruin a marriage.

Common Causes of Emotional Affairs

Many emotional affairs begin in the workplace. When a husband spends a lot of time working closely with a female co-worker, he has plenty of opportunity to turn a working friendship into an emotional affair. This is especially true when the unfaithful spouse and co-worker spend a lot of time alone together. At the same time, the betrayed spouse may have stopped encouraging or sharing her heart with her spouse. She may have grown distant from him at home, leaving a hole that he desired to fill with this other relationship. Her husband’s emotional affair is not her fault, but she should look to see if there is anything she could be doing better in her marital relationship.

How to Heal After an Emotional Affair

Healing begins with confession. This may be a hurtful time that requires hard words. The married couple may find it helpful to see a counselor, who can help them communicate and get back on track with their marriage. Healing also takes time because it involves building up trust. Both spouses must work hard at building and accepting trust. And there may be a need for emotional distance before they can really begin to speak respectfully and lovingly to each other again. Above all, healing requires patience and dedication. Healing a broken marriage is not for the faint of heart. If you want your marriage to be stronger than ever, you must communicate well and deal respectfully with each other’s emotions. You must be willing to forgive each other, and also be committed to not giving up on the cause.

Taking Care of Yourself

A big key to healing after an emotional affair is taking care of yourself. Respect yourself, and let others know when they are doing something you can’t accept. Being independent allows you to recharge your own emotions so you have more to give your spouse. We can help you regain your emotional balance. Whether you want couples counseling or individual counseling, please contact us so we can begin talking about your situation.