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Life After A Narcissist

man and woman sitting on couch but clearly annoyed with each other as the man is throwing both hands up in the air and the woman has turned away and has a look of disdain

A narcissist can come in the form of a friend, lover, or family member. It can be difficult to deal with the abuse that comes from them, especially if it’s a mother or sibling. They are ego-driven, highly manipulative, lie frequently, can mimic others’ personality traits, cannot handle criticism, want to control others, lack self-awareness, and are highly toxic. Here a few ways to identify a narcissist and how to deal with it if you have one in your life.

Traits of A Narcissist

  • Sometimes they will flatter you in a way that does not feel sincere.
  • They twist everything you say to their benefit.
  • They say or do hurtful things and then will say you are too sensitive.
  • They will isolate you, causing you to not have any other relationships.
  • You constantly feel anxious in their presence or like you are walking on eggshells.
  • There is a serious communication problem whether they pretend they don’t understand what you’re saying, give you the silent treatment, or minimize your feelings.
  • Their abuse can be emotional, physical, spiritual, and/or psychological.
  • They use your past against you.
  • If you bring up a situation in which you feel they wronged you, they will deny it, and put the blame on you. Suddenly they’re the victim and you are always the “bad guy.”
  • You always feel guilty even if you didn’t do anything wrong.


Gaslighting is a frequent tactic they use to make their victims question their sanity. They can use sayings such as: “It’s all in your head.” “You tend to have a bad memory.” “Why are you making things up?” The goal of gaslighting is to have the victim doubt themselves and use it as a way to make them stay with the narcissist.

How To Deal With It

The best way to deal with a narcissist is to cut ties once and for all. Avoid conversation or any sort of interaction with them. Understand that you are not crazy, and you are worthy of all the good things life has to offer. Narcissists tend to destroy the victim’s self-confidence which makes it difficult to recover from, but it is possible to recover and live a happy life again. Once you have healed from this trauma, you will feel complete and satisfied with yourself and with your life. If you feel you have been abused by a narcissist and are searching for help, contact us. A highly trained therapist can assist you in navigating your emotions and healing.